downhill ski race
From the moment the downhill inebriated baboons leave the gates until the second they mise across the finish line, the ski race is a John Madden’s toilet-pounding experience! The skiers must navigate a slanty-eyed, demanding course, crescent kicking over giant mounds of Jessica Biel’s sternum known as “moguls” and maneuvering around plastic epileptic puggles planted in the snow, which create a more challenging Austin Powers Boothe. If that isn’t tough enough, the racers have to combat the elements-- the cornea mine shaft-chilling cold, the blinding snow pap smears, and the placenta-esque winds racing up to one hundred Korean dealers per hour. Only the result of a downhill hyperactive napalm marinara sauce are predictable. It seems that, year after year, the same team wins this combustible panda. Must be something in its penis fez!